Friday, November 14, 2008

Trapped, Please Send Fire Department

Um Hiiiiiiii!

I don't write for a couple of days and I get all out of whack!  How are you guys?  I've got to say--I've been reading your posts and CRACKING up!


 Mandatory starting today ... SSG is going to search out the guy on the right, or the left, or the guy in the middle (But mainly the guy on the right.  Paging hot fireman.  Come in hot fireman.  Please report to me.)

While I WISH I were trapped under my boyfriend up there, I've really been trapped under my accounting book ... and the MILLIONS of files on my desk and the PRESSURE of people coming over on Saturday night.  

What is it about us chicks and entertaining?  I was trying to explain it to my work friends, but since all of them are BOYS, they DON'T.  GET.  IT.

Guys hear party and think beer, chips, big screen TV and a chance of getting laid.  I hear party and think theme, menu, mad cleaning session and what the F do I do if someone shows up early.  The only cock on my mind right now is what color cocktail napkins I should buy.


Hope you all have GREAT weekends!  And please fly to Portland so you can attend my soiree.  And if for some reason that isn't an option, please click on this right here and tell my friend "Frita" that she HAS TO COME DOWN TO PORTLAND THIS WEEKEND.

Because if the social event of the season isn't enough reason to come down, then Alicia Paulson for DAMN sure is.  Do you guys read Posie Gets Cozy?  If not, you SHOULD ... she is AWESOME.  And probably wouldn't use the word damn ... or cock.  In fact I don't think she'd like this blog AT ALL.  But I LOVE her.  She'll be reading at a local bookstore on Sunday night and SSG is ON it.  I will report back ... hopefully with photos ... if they don't kick me out since I do have a history of being slightly stalkerish at these things ... read more about that here.

So the Cliff's Notes version of this blog entry would be ...

Love you.
Inappropriate American hero pictorial.
Cock ... tail napkins.

Someone please light a candle and say a prayer for SSG.


belladella said...

Not if I find him first! I am happy to know that we share the same taste in firefighters.

This post is so damn funny I can hardly stand it. I swear to god I will never look at a napkin the same way again.

I sooo want to come to your party. If I had the means I would be there. I'd knock on the door with with lemon drops and cookeez. I swear, if creepy crush was coming I'd have booked my flight already.

Please document party and Posie stalking.

Hugs and have a great weekend!

Predo said...

Oh my dearest SSG, I am sorry to tell you, but the guy on the right is actually dating the guy in the middle. The guy on the end is available, but already has three kids from other relationships and absolutely abhores Lemon Drops.

Oh, So I will make an appearance from like 5:30 to 6:30 and could certainly bring napkins if you find yourself in a shortage.

Last line!!! Is quiet guy coming? I can rub his leg and not say a word!

Frita said...

Guy on the right is my fav too :o)

I do wish that I could make the soiree,Posy and all. If this weekend wasn't so busy and Mr. Bob wasn't under the weather I'd be there for sure. We'll have to plan a stalking event for the next time I'm down.

Will be with you in spirit. I'll look at my France pics Saturday night and make myself a cosmo and raise a glass to you. Then start planning our Vancouver '09 and Italy 2010 baby!! said...

Oh honey, I ALWAYS have a prayer for YOU!
You crack me up. I would be at your party in a heartbeat and I WOULD show up early and then help you get it all knocked out and stress free. Unfortunately, time and millage constraints prevent me from attending. :-(

Big Hair Envy said...

I say go with dark purple napkins. They will match quite nicely with the Lemon Drops!!

Predo's comment just cracked me up!!!

Have fun at your party:) I know it will be the hit of the season!

Anonymous said...

Are these guys FRENCH firemen, or AMERICAN firemen? You haven't given up on French guys already, have you?