Thursday, March 12, 2009

OMFG Please Kill Me

It is almost 1:30 a.m. on Thursday morning.  


I am supposed to wake up in 3 short hours.  

But instead I am wide awake RIGHT NOW trying to figure out a way to tell my neighbor to turn off the bass on whatever stereotelevisionvideogame he currently has on that is making my brain stem vibrate.  You know, a polite way.  That doesn't involve a blow torch and a pair of pliers.  I'm sure I have a pair in my "Do It Herself Toolkit" for just such an occasion.

And have I mentioned that I don't share any walls with this person?  So whatever it is, it is so LOUD that it's making its way through his walls AND the foot of space that separates us AND into my walls ... and HEAD, which is making me want to go ahead and just get in my car, drive one house over, roll the windows down, crank the stereo and set off my car alarm while parked in his driveway and then be all "what's up?" when he walks out of his house.

NOT THAT HE COULD HEAR ANY OF THAT HAPPENING.

Any suggestions before I watch a few episodes of CSI to figure out how not to get caught if I end up KILLING HIM?


13 comments:

Unknown said...

Put on a pair of rubber gloves and go pull his electric meter out of the meter socket. It will take him at least an hour to figure it out and if not, then maybe he will get the message.

What an ass...

Bella Della said...

Yes, 911.

Maybe the cop they send will be supa hot.

Molly said...

i vote for 911 or calling your homeowner's association prez and make them do it. gotta get some value for them dues. or if your hoa provides security, call security and get them to go over - they are usually off duty policemen, right?

but my personal favorite is go throw the switch on the outside electrical box like Marlene said.

I Am Woody said...

Crazy how that bass can vibrate you til you are INSANE!! Yes, I have one of THOSE neighbors too. I have often thought of breaking in and messing up his woofer!!

ab said...

I say go over there during the day/evening and ask nicely. If it continues to happen you have every reason to mess with the electrical box and/or call the police. That's just rude.

Predo said...

I say we collect a herd of drag queens to go over and attack his home. he would answer the door and be buried in a flood of high heels. If we have photo's and journalists, he will likely not want that to ever happen again!

Otherwise, I would send a note to your HOA, because they wrote the bi-laws on the standard and that is why you pay them!

I that doesn't work, we can write complaint notes in like twenty-five different notes and tape them all to his door!

Anonymous said...

Don't be passive-aggressive about it. Go over there as soon as you get home from work and tell him, the noise from your house kept me awake the entire night. Please keep it down. He probably has no idea it was loud enough to bother you. If it continues, then you can call the police or the HOA. But you have to do your part first.

Candy said...

Oh man, I feel your pain. Been there. I grew up in a 2 family house and the people downstairs from us used to get drunk, turn the music full blast and fall into a drunken stupor. No amount of stamping, screaming, retaliation or knocking would wake them. It was hell. I'm sorry :(

mom x 2 said...

I say 911 :) and when you leave for work (which is when they will be sleeping) park in their drive way and blow the horn repeatedly and when they come outside, be sure to ask them " oh did I wake you"

good luck!

(Sometimes!) Serendipitous Girl said...

Oh thanks so much ladies! That boy has you all to thank that he didn't die.

(I decided to not say anything unless it happens again. I've lived next door to the guy for over 4 years and couldn't even tell you his name, nor have I heard a peep out of him ever. So I'm sure it will go back to normal ... unless he has frozen heads in his freezer. Then I'll be that person on the news that says "he was always really quiet!")

HalfAsstic.com said...

Eh, oh yeah. You need to have a "Come to Jesus" with him. At least that's what we call a severe dressing down.
But before you get the torch and pliers and all that call the cops. Because that? Ridiculous.

Suz Broughton said...

Def need to have someone else handle. Why get your neighbor peeved at you. Call police and act all outraged when he tells you someone called the police on him. That works.

Lys said...

You definitely need to have a "discussion" with this neighbor. However, if it's the neighbor that used to be hot until the po po got him, well, I'd just say call the cops and have them do all the fun stuff.

Sending virtual earplugs and Unisom your way :) (I have a gamer downstairs and the cops just are of no help and with the new dorm situation here, well, I have a whole new appreciation for Advil PM)